C: Am I pretentious?
J: About what? Your medical opinions on gerbils MAY be a touch pretentious.
C: Like, in general. About grammar.
J: Oh, for sure. But you’re a linguistics masters person and worked at a newspaper. Most grammar people ARE pretentious and people find them insufferable—like almost every copy across the board. I think it has something to do with the job, correcting mistakes in basic writing.
C: I also have a soapbox rant about “rules” being a product of upper classes oppressing the lower classes in response to increasing literacy throughout England (you know, since we speak English).
J: Copy editor: You’re not using that word correctly.
Writer: Step off, or I’ll use the word incorrectly on you!
Writer: I need something with a little more pizzas.
Copy editor: You mean pizzazz.
Writer: No. I mean pizzas.
C: Too many adjectives! Show, don’t tell.
J: Show, don’t TELL?! ARE YOU INTO POETRY NOW?
C: My feelings on poetry haven’t changed.
J: Says the person whose default disagrees with the Stini.
C: What does that have to do with anything?
J: You probably do like poetry but are too stubborn.
C: I’m not stubborn!