J: Did you hear about the most recent gun-related tragedy? The gun enthusiasts got confused and accidentally armed bears.
C: I support MY RIGHT to arm bears!
J: I want to show up at a gun rally with a stuffed bear arm.
C: What if you showed up with bare arms? Which reminds me, I heard an ad recently from Trojan for their “bear skin condoms.” I was like, ‘What the hell is a bear skin condom?’ Then I looked it up. Bare skin condoms…
J: Bear Skin Condom: Strong enough for a man, pH balanced for a bear.
Bare skin condoms: aka, not wearing a condom at all.
C: Bear Skin Condoms: Endorsed by ManBearPig! For real men who are half man, half bear, half pig.
J: I just saw two squirrels having sex.
C: Were they using a condom?
J: A bare skin condom.
C: So that’s why we have so many squirrels.