J: More shark attacks in North Carolina. The coward news media refuses to call it terrorism.
C: Who’s the terrorist organization claiming credit?
J: S.h.a.r.k.s. Sharks Hate All Races, Kindergartens, and Species.
C: Oh no! Not the kindergarteners? They’re only bite-sized!
J: Why did the shark cross the road? …to eat you.
C: The people the sharks attacked didn’t even die.
J: WTF?! Are you a shark apologist? If not for the actions of the civilians on the beach, they’d be dead. The sharks bit off their arms. That’s like Sharia law, only without the stealing! And humans are primarily on land. Once we move to the waters, there’ll be way more shark attacks!
I mean, squirrels run and hop fences and we kill them. We kill bears and wolves if they get too close. Sharks are no different! But much worse. We just don’t realize it because they’re out of sight and out of mind. It doesn’t mean we shouldn’t do something about it.